“Let grasses grow and waters flow
In a free and easy way,
But give me enough of the rare old stuff
That’s made near Galway Bay,
Come gangers all from Donegal,
Sligo and Leitrim too,
Oh, we’ll give the slip and we’ll take a sip
Of the rare old Mountain Dew”
Well, it’s not actually made near Galway Bay, rather Country Cork—but that’s aside from the point. It’s not made in Tullamore either… But we’ll forgive that as tonight’s review is one of the classic, ubiquitous Irish Whiskies, Tullamore Dew. On the political scale of things Tullamore Dew is known as a classic Catholic whiskey, proper Republican as it were, but let us not linger on the conflicts that divide us, but rather the ties that bind. These, my friends, are whiskey and song—and these happen to be two of Ireland’s finest exports. Why do I raise the subject? You didn’t think I would get to it, did you: New Year’s. Yes, I’m a tad late. As they say I got proper knackered on the eve of the New Year, and I didn’t write you all. Don’t pretend you care. Well, if any holiday is about liquor and song it’s New Year’s Eve with its champagne and “Auld Lang Syne.” Well I had a bit of that meself, the sing along to the old Scotch tune. I’ll be honest and say I drank far more than whiskey—beer, Akavitt, champagne, whiskey, more whiskey, a sidecar…some water. I spent the evening with my dad and his buddies and my sister, they sang karaoke, I hacked my phlegmatic lungs in for a song or two, but as 2015 rolled in I found myself atuned to the likes of the Pogues and the Clancy Brothers, and the juice of the barley. Perhaps the booze inside me was resonating as that frequency. Right, well, happy New Year and Merry Christmas your arse, I pray god it’s our last. That’s a lyric, I don’t mean that. Maybe I do, anyways here’s the review, which is probably why you’re reading.
Nose: A light wisp of alcohol, some light green apple notes and an ever so slight hint of vanilla.
Palette: Very light, with an almost chardonnay like buttery note, faint vanilla and some grain notes
Finish: Like a light buttered white bread with slight hint of lingering citrus…I think?
So what do I have to say about Tullamore Dew? Well it ain’t no Rare Auld Mountain Dew, it’s on every liquor store shelf for about $20. And at that price it’s brawling with the other big names of the Irish as a daily drinker, as your shot and a pint, as a quick tipple. It’s not exceptional, but I highly doubt it’s supposed to be. It’s a competitive easy drinker, a singer’s lubricant, and another kind drink to bring us all together in the New Year…until the goddamn meddling tee-totalers start more wars and silence the singers, bleeding bastards. To sum up this mediocre review:
“And all I’ve done for want of wit, to memory now I cannot recall.
So fill me to the parting glass. Goodnight and joy be with you all.”